Phylicia Masonheimer: From Secret Sin to Serious Theology

Phylicia Masonheimer wasn’t even a teenager yet when she was exposed to and trapped by sexual sin after she stumbled upon a “smut novel” at a garage sale. But after discovering the transformative power of Jesus Christ in her teens, she found that faith in Him empowered her—and can do the same for you.

On this episode of GPS: God. People. Stories., Phylicia shares how personal struggles can become a platform for ministry and making disciples. 

Connect with us through email at gps@billygraham.org or on Facebook at Billy Graham Radio. 

If you’d like to know more about beginning a relationship with Jesus Christ, or deepening the faith you already have, visit FindPeacewithGod.net.

If you’d like to pray with someone, call our Billy Graham 24/7 Prayer Line at 855-255-7729. 

Transcript

Phylicia Masonheimer:
[00:00:00] We moved. And we had nowhere to go. I felt like Mary. There was no room at the inn. Where was I going to live and have this baby? I just had no idea. None of the hospitals would take me because I was so late in term. And so, I had to switch to a home birth last minute. And then, I had to find a place to have the baby. I had to find a home to have the birth. So, it was absolutely insane situation. 

Jim Kirkland
[00:00:23] Unemployment, health challenges, and a darker struggle years earlier. They’ve all shaped Phylicia Masonheimer’s understanding of God. And she hopes her experiences will do the same for you. This is GPS: God. People. Stories. An outreach of the Billy Graham Evangelistic Association. I’m Jim Kirkland. Through all of her struggles, Phylicia came to better understand who God really is. That, says Billy Graham, is vital to living a life of meaning and purpose. 

Billy Graham:
[00:00:52] According to the Bible, who is Jesus is the most important question you or anyone else will ever ask or get an answer to. Who is Jesus Christ? Who is Jesus Christ? And what does He mean to you? 

Jim Kirkland:
[00:01:08] Billy Graham will provide some biblical truths to help you answer those questions a bit later in the episode. You can also explore more about Jesus and who He can be in your life at our website. The address is FindPeacewithGod.net. That’s FindPeacewithGod.net. And if you’d like to talk with someone, someone is waiting to talk with you at the Billy Graham 24/7 prayer line. (855) 255-PRAY. (855) 255-PRAY. And if you’re going how can I remember all this information, don’t worry at all. We always include the web address and the prayer line number in the our show notes. 

Music and Audio tag:
[00:01:54]

Jim Kirkland:
[00:02:00] Phylicia Masonheimer grew up on a horse farm in northern Michigan. It’s the same rural area where she lives today. 

Phylicia Masonheimer:
[00:02:08] We had a lovely childhood. Lot’s of outside time. Lots of reading. Lots of studying. Lots of friends. It-it was very beautiful. And my parents worked hard to create that for us. My parents were believers who really took seriously their role in discipling me and my five younger siblings. 

Jim Kirkland:
[00:02:29] Her parents also took on the role of educators homeschooling all six of their children. 

Phylicia Masonheimer:
[00:02:35] They were very personally devout, but they also were actively teaching us how to think critically about faith. And one of the things I’m most grateful for in my childhood is that there was no question about faith that was off limits. I don’t remember feeling like I couldn’t ask a question about God, or the Bible, or other religions even and that it wouldn’t be answered. 

Jim Kirkland:
[00:03:03] But Phylicia’s eyes were also opened to the hypocrisy of some other Christians. 

Phylicia Masonheimer:
[00:03:09] There were aspects of my childhood and experiences with extended family that also exposed me to the reality of spiritual abuse and emotional abuse among believers or professing believers. Walking with my parents through those experiences did show me that there’s a big difference between people who claim to be Christian and people who actually are. And I think that also really shaped my understanding of the church and my desire for a just and righteous Christianity. 

Jim Kirkland:
[00:03:50] Something else the experience taught Phylicia is that redemption is always possible. She learned that by watching her parents remain faithful to God and extend forgiveness to those responsible for the abuse. There was another struggle in Phylicia’s life that would impact her faith. One that was much more personal. When she was 12, she happened upon an erotic novel at a garage sale. 

Phylicia Masonheimer:
[00:04:15] It’s so random, you know, but I was a big reader. And it didn’t have a cover on it. It was just … the cover had been ripped off. So, I was curious and opened it straight up to this explicit scene. And curiosity and shame drive things underground. And my parents did the best they could. But the time that we were living in, that’s the height of purity culture. It’s the end of the ‘90s and early 2000s when purity culture was giving these messages about purity that were very works based. An action of sheltering but no real teaching or communication on sexuality itself from a biblical perspective. And that did leave a void that made it very hard for me to open up about what I was walking through at that time. 

Jim Kirkland:
[00:05:04] That left Phylicia more vulnerable to the temptation. And she soon spiraled into an addiction to pornographic fiction. She found it difficult to talk to God about her addiction because she also struggled with perfectionism. 

Phylicia Masonheimer:
[00:05:16] I was always messing up. And I remember like literally beginning to have these conversations in my head with the Lord. I was 12 or 13 starting to have these conversations and these questions internally and wrestling with God over like what’s the point if I can’t be good enough. 

Jim Kirkland:
[00:05:33] That wrestling changed to a life changing realization a few years later. Phylicia was 16 and sitting in the back pasture of her family’s horse farm. She had read a devotional book that helped her understand that she could never be good enough. 

Phylicia Masonheimer:
[00:05:49] Like I realized that I couldn’t do it on my own. And that there needed to be an intercessor to make it possible for me to live in freedom. To live in victory. To live with purpose. And so, that’s very simple, but that changed everything. 

Jim Kirkland:
[00:06:09] The intercessor Phylicia realized she needed, the intercessor we all need, is Jesus Christ. 

Phylicia Masonheimer:
[00:06:16] What pushed me over the edge into following Christ was really my desire to be good and a frustration with my inability to be good or perfect. It transformed my view of myself in a profound way. Because there was this constant shame that was really pressuring me and part of the reason that I felt I could not be perfect. I could not be good enough. And a conflict within my soul which happens when you’re trapped in any kind of besetting sin. There’s an inner conflict within you that you do feel that you can’t get out from under. And that was where I was. So, by coming to Christ, the power of that was really broken. 

Jim Kirkland:
[00:07:01] That decision to surrender her life to Jesus was Phylicia’s first and biggest step in fully overcoming her addiction to pornographic novels. She found more freedom as she studied what the Bible had to say about repentance. 

Phylicia Masonheimer:
[00:07:14] Like I was starting to see, oh, there’s a way out of this. And I began to really process what I was learning in the Bible writing it out for my own sake. Trying to understand like what does it mean to repent. What does the Bible say about repentance? And what I didn’t realize was that 16, 17, 18 years old, I was wrestling with very theological questions that were-were impacting how I saw myself and how I saw the world. 

Jim Kirkland:
[00:07:40] That wrestling ignited in Phylicia a love for studying theology and Scripture. Something she could do even more of when she started college at Liberty University in Virginia. And Liberty is where she would also meet her future husband Josh. 

Phylicia Masonheimer: [00:07:55] We started out as friends. And you know, I’ll be the first to admit that it was a bumpy road for us. We both were emotionally immature and needed a lot of growth. I made a lot of mistakes, I think, in relationships at that state of my life where I was learning how to walk in my identity in Christ instead of, you know, trying to get the approval of people. 

Jim Kirkland:
[00:08:22] Josh and Phylicia had different hobbies and personalities. But what they shared was a common desire to build a life that is grounded in the Word of God. That commitment to the Word of God was also something that Phylicia expressed in a blog she was writing. She started it when she was a teenager and continued writing it while dating Josh. 

Phylicia Masonheimer:
[00:08:42] My blog was related to a theology related again to that pornography addiction that I had had. And my process of understanding the theology behind that addiction, the theology of repentance, and a sanctification like how can we actually be free from this. Because at that time, very few women were talking about pornography addiction. So, I had this blog where I talked about sexuality, and theology, and cultural issues, and a conversation around sex and purity and modesty. Kind of undoing some of those messages from purity culture, but also just engaging with the questions that single women had. 

Jim Kirkland:
[00:09:20] But soon, Phylicia was no longer a single woman. She and Josh tied the knot in 2014. 

Phylicia Masonheimer:
[00:09:27] I’m almost 24 when we get married. And I continued blogging, and writing, and had more opportunities to do that. So, I was writing for other magazines, other websites, and building out my own website which at that point had 400 or so blogposts on it. And so, we were using that content to continue to share with people. And Instagram came into existence at this point. So, you know, we’re using that. We’re using Facebook, and Pinterest, and things like that to reach more women with this truth. 

Jim Kirkland:
[00:09:57] Phylicia continued to build her online ministry while also working in higher education. 

Phylicia Masonheimer:
[00:10:03] Everything was going extremely well for us because we were living in Virginia. I had a job that I loved. Josh had a well paying job. And we were in a lovely little apartment. And it was just a really great situation. 

Jim Kirkland:
[00:10: 18] Then, they became pregnant. Suddenly, Josh’s heavy travel schedule was going to become a problem. So, he took a new job. One that moved them from Virginia to Lancaster, Pennsylvania when Phylicia was pregnant. And in fact, they moved when she was almost due. 

Phylicia Masonheimer:
[00:10:35] We moved, and we had nowhere to go. I felt like Mary. There was no room at the inn. Where was I going to live and have this baby? I just had no idea. None of the hospitals would take me because I was so late in term. And so, I had to switch to a home birth last minute. And then, I had to find a place to have the baby. I had to find a home to have the birth. So, it was absolutely insane situation. 

Jim Kirkland:
[00:10:58] It may have seemed insane from their perspective but not from God’s. He led them to a midwife to help with the baby’s delivery. Then, He answered their prayers about a place to live. 

Phylicia Masonheimer:
[00:11:10] We drove around and saw three apartments. They were all like second floor, which you really can’t really do, um, for this situation. And then, we were driving down Main Street. And there was a really tiny sign just like obscured by bushes. It said for rent on this little house on Main Street. And we were like, oh, we’ll call them. And we went in and met them. A beautiful little duplex. The landlord lived on the other side. And this is a sweet woman who ended up being a believer, had been a missionary in Mexico. And, um, as we were touring it, she said so where are you having your baby. And we’re like we’re not … we can’t … I don’t know if we should like tell her like that we kind of need to have it here. And we said, well, we’re not going to lie. We have to have the baby here. Is that okay with you? She said, yeah. Absolutely. 

Jim Kirkland:
[00:11:55] Five days after they moved in, Phylicia gave birth to a healthy little girl they named Adeline. But shortly afterward, Phylicia faced a health challenge. A pregnancy induced autoimmune disease. 

Phylicia Masonheimer: [00:12:07] When Adeline was a week old, I was so miserable because my autoimmune disease had realized itself and come to the surface. And I was like what is going on. I was covered in blisters and hives and itchy. 

Jim Kirkland:
[00:12:19] None of that discomfort kept Phylicia, Josh, and Adeline from visiting a church. 

Phylicia Masonheimer:
[00:12:24] As we walked in with her, this tiny little baby, after the service all of these women came up to me and said are you new here. Do you go to the … do you know about our mom’s ministry? Do you need help getting to our mom’s ministry? We’ll pick you up. We’ll drive you here. Do you have a meal train? They made me a meal train having never met me. Brought me meals for six weeks and offered to drive me to the mom’s group. Offered to come to my house and help me. These people completely surrounded us. And many of them are still our friends to this day. We still go back and see them. We still go back to that church whenever we visit Pennsylvania out of gratitude for how they carried us in that season. 

Jim Kirkland:
[00:13:02] That season in Pennsylvania ended up being a short one for the Masonheimers. Once again, Josh’s job threw a wrench into their plans. 

Phylicia Masonheimer:
[00:13:10] Ended up traveling just as much and was gone constantly which is why we then moved to Michigan. 

Jim Kirkland:
[00:13:16] About a year into their new Michigan life and seven months into their second pregnancy, Josh was part of a mass round of layoffs at his new job. It came one day after he and Phylicia had signed the mortgage on their new home. 

Phylicia Masonheimer:
[00:13:30] And he was one of the people who was laid off because he was a new hire. And when he came home, I saw him … I saw him drive up. And I was like I know exactly why he’s here. 

Jim Kirkland:
[00:13:39] Early in their marriage during a time of prayer, Phylicia felt as if God was telling her that Josh would lose his job. And that she needed to be prepared for it when it happened. The way she had been preparing without even realizing it was through her years of writing. 

Phylicia Masonheimer:
[00:13:56] We’re down to our last $500.00. We had just bought our house. It did not look good. I thought, well, what if I compiled all of these blogposts that I’ve written on sexuality into a book, and I sold it as an e-book for $10.00. So, that’s what I did. And the e-book was so successful that it provided for us for three months and allowed us to kind of make it through the birth of Eva and helped Josh find another job. 

Jim Kirkland: [00:14:25] When that happened, Phylicia realized they could compile her other works into affordable e-books. E-books that would provide more resources to help people think theologically about different cultural issues. Still, it was a difficult time for their family. 

Phylicia Masonheimer:
[00:14:42] We had to pause our payments on things. And my father-in-law sent us $500.00 to help us make it through. You know, it was scary because there aren’t a ton of engineering jobs in a small town. Josh was really having to work hard to find a job. It was very nerve-wracking. But again, God provided, and we made it through. So, that was a blessing in and of itself. 

Jim Kirkland:
[00:15:05] Josh found a job. And not only did they make it through, they thrived as Phylicia’s online ministry continued to grow. In 2020, Phylicia was pregnant with their third child, a boy, while also taking care of their other two children. 

Phylicia Masonheimer:
[00:15:20] We knew that the direction the ministry was headed and the growth that we’d had in our marriage and in our vision for reaching people with the Gospel was growing in clarity. That we thought, you know, it would be really cool if in between three and five years Josh could come home to work with the ministry. And we could work together. This was not our immediate vision. We expected it would take quite some time. 

Jim Kirkland:
[0:15:45] But it didn’t. They felt like the time to make a change was then. 

Phylicia Masonheimer:
[00:15:50] Josh said, you know, what if I come home now temporarily. And I will supplement our income by working part-time. And I’ll take over watching the children. And you can write. And by having that time to write, you can produce more books. They would then support the ministry and support us. 

Jim Kirkland:
[00:16:09] Phylicia knew it was risky but decided to give it a try. 

Phylicia Masonheimer:
[00:16:13] He resigned, came home, and we just completely switched roles. He took over meals. He took over cleaning; he took over launder. Took over the kids. And I wrote sometimes 12 hours a day. 

Jim Kirkland:
[00:16:23] Those long days of writing produced a book she called Theology Basics. It’s an overview of Christian theology for beginners. And once again, one of Phylicia’s books provided for their family. 

Phylicia Masonheimer:
[00:16:36] Through that in 2020, God completely changed the trajectory of our family. And ever since then, Josh never had to take a part-time job. He was able to stay home and work for the ministry. And he still does today. 

Jim Kirkland:
[00:16:48] Together, the couple runs their ministry. Its name is Every Woman a Theologian. It teaches Christians to know what they believe, why they believe it, and how to communicate it graciously to the world. 

Phylicia Masonheimer:
[00:17:03] Josh leads the logistical side of the ministry, and I lead the executive side. And we have 10 amazing people who help us to run the ministry today. It’s amazing. Our two year plan became immediate plan. And we didn’t know what we would do. But yeah, little by little God just provided. 

Jim Kirkland:
[00:17:21] The Masonheimer family has seen God provide for them in every season of their life. And they know that they can continue to trust Him through whatever lies ahead. 

Phylicia Masonheimer:
[00:17:31] Even in the hardest seasons, last year we walked through secondary infertility. We lost two babies to miscarriage. We had a series of other significant losses in 2024. But you know, once again, it just comes back to do you trust Him to work it all together, to weave it all together, to do something greater than we can see? And by trusting Him, we have seen the goodness of God in the land of the living. 

Music tag:
[00:17:57]

Jim Kirkland:
[00:18:07] Maybe you can identify with Phylicia Masonheimer’s story of walking through difficult seasons of life. But maybe you’ve never trusted Jesus Christ to carry you through and be your Savior the way that Phylicia has. You can change that right now. You can begin to experience the peace that Jesus offers even in the most challenging circumstances. We can tell you more at FindPeacewithGod.net. That’s FindPeacewithGod.net. And if you would like someone to pray with you, you can call the Billy Graham 24/7 prayer line. Someone is waiting to talk with you at (855) 255-PRAY. (855) 255-PRAY. And if you didn’t catch the phone number or the website address, no worry. You can always find them in our show notes. Now, a question. How would you complete this sentence? I choose to see life in Christ as … You might be surprised how Phylicia Masonheimer finishes that sentence. You’ll hear it in just a moment. 

Music and Audio tag:
[00:19:15] 

Billy Graham:
[00:19:24] Who is Jesus Christ? 

Announcer:
[00:19:26] Billy Graham … 

Billy Graham:
[00:19:27] According to the Bible, who is Jesus is the most important question you or anyone else will ever ask or get an answer to. Who is Jesus Christ? And what does He mean to you? The Bible says He is the Creator. The Bible says that Jesus created it all. Jesus not only was the creative Christ, but He was the compassionate Christ. See, God loves us. He’s interested in you. He will direct your life. He will give you a joy, and a peace, and assurance, and a certainty of heaven that you never dreamed existed if you put your confidence and your faith in Him. And then, He is also the crucified Christ. And because of what He did on that cross, God says I forgive you. Not only did He die on the cross, He rose from the dead. Thank God we have a Living Christ. 

Jim Kirkland:
[00:20:26] You can begin discovering right now the different that the Living Christ can make in you life. Go to FindPeacewithGod.net. That’s FindPeacewithGod.net. Or talk with us. Call us at the Billy Graham 24/7 prayer line. (855) 255-PRAY. (855) 255-PRAY. Our guest on this episode of GPS: God. People. Stories. is Phylicia Masonheimer. She’s founder of the ministry Every Woman a Theologian. She wants to help you whether you’re a man or a woman see life as a follower of Christ as something to embrace and enjoy. 

Phylicia Masonheimer:
[00:21:07] And so, for us to have hope after walking this path and the ups and downs that have been on this path for us, I choose to see life in Christ as this adventure. You just don’t know what’s around the corner, but it’s going to be good. And I expect it to be good even if it’s hard. That there will be a good that’s coming out of it. And that expectation is biblical. Jesus said, in this world you will have trouble. But take heart for I have overcome the world. John16:33. And so, in that passage, He’s saying, yes, there will be trials. There will be difficulty, and I have overcome that difficulty. And you will see a redemption within it. And so, looking at church history and people who came before us and how they walked through things like this, that inspires me. And I hope it would inspire you to know you’re not alone in walking through hard things. You’re not alone in suffering. But look at your life as this adventure with God where He’s leading you personally, specifically by his Holy Spirit. You don’t know what’s around the corner, but it's going to be exciting. And there’s going to be redemption. And that means that every day you get to wake up to what’s God going to do today. And that, to me, is a very exciting way to live. 

Jim Kirkland:
[00:22:21] We’re thankful for Phylicia Masonheimer joining us on this episode. She’s a woman who tells the world about Jesus by talking about theology and cultural topics. Oh, and after we recorded our interview with Phylicia, she announced on social media that she and Josh are expecting their fourth baby this fall. Speaking of sharing things on social media, would you consider sharing this episode of GPS on your social media? If it meant a lot to you, it’ll mean a lot to somebody within your circle. It helps us a whole lot when you tell other people about GPS. It also helps when you subscribe and when you leave a comment.  We post new episodes every other Wednesday. I’m Jim Kirkland, and this is GPS: God. People. Stories. It’s an outreach of the Billy Graham Evangelistic Association. Always good news. 

Music tag:
[00:23:10]

End of transcript