Big Daddy Weave Reflects on Loss of Brother and Bandmate

When Mike Weaver’s brother died of COVID-19 in 2022, he lost both a lifelong friend and a bandmate—but the story doesn’t end there.

Find out more about the brothers’ relationship, ministry, and band, Big Daddy Weave, on this episode of GPS: God. People. Stories. 

You can connect with us through email at gps@billygraham.org or on Billy Graham Radio on Facebook. 

Transcript

MUSIC STARTS

Mike Weaver:
00:00:01 They literally had to call for an ambulance. They came and they took him to the hospital. We never heard from him again.

Jim Kirkland: Mike Weaver was stuck in quarantine with COVID-19 when his younger brother, Jay, died from the same virus, several states away. The situation was tragic.

Mike:
00:00:18 I heard him take his last breath, his exhale, over the phone. We had watched him hurt so much in a way that he wasn’t even telling us. And in that moment there, that was the end of all of his hurt. I don’t know what it looked like when he saw Him, but I know that Jesus was there.

MUSIC TRANSITION

Jim: Jay Weaver’s passing could have been the end of the ministry he and Mike built with their band, Big Daddy Weave. Find out more of the brothers’ story, including how they began Big Daddy Weave, here on this episode of GPS: God. People. Stories., it’s an outreach of the Billy Graham Evangelistic Association. I’m Jim Kirkland.

Mike’s rock-solid belief in salvation through Jesus Christ gave him a supernatural peace in the wake of his brother’s death. Billy Graham often talked about death and what happens to us after we die.

Billy Graham: 
00:01:44 “If a man die, shall he live again?” Men have asked that question for centuries. They have speculated; they have analyzed; they have grasped at every shred of evidence that points to the possibilities of a future life. “If a man die, shall he live again?”

Jim: You’ll hear Billy Graham’s answer to that question a little later in this episode. You can also learn more about life after death, right now, at our website. 
That’s FindPeaceWithGod.net. It’s a place where you can ask spiritual questions and learn more about being a follower of Jesus Christ. That address again is: FindPeaceWithGod.net.

Intro: GPS: God. People. Stories.

MUSIC TRANSITION

Mike:
00:02:35 My little brother Jay, he was 3½ years younger than I was. We became best friends over time and then played music together in Big Daddy Weave for over 20 years. This year is 25 years for Big Daddy Weave. He passed only a couple years ago, but man, he was sort of the hub in the middle of the wheel in Big Daddy Weave. 

Jim: Mike and Jay Weaver grew up in a Christian home in Gulf Breeze, Florida, a suburb of Pensacola. 

Mike:
00:03:02 I remember looking for my dad on a Saturday and us being like, Where’s Dad, Mom? And, he had made a place in his closet where he would lay on his face and pray for hours for us.

Jim: Prayer would also become a powerful part of the boys’ lives, after they started a relationship with Jesus Christ. 

Mike:
00:03:20 I remember at 9 years old, the pastor in our little Methodist church [had] given a call, and then I just felt compelled, you know, and I went down. I remember the feeling of his 5 o’clock shadow, you know? [chuckle] His cheek is on my cheek, and he’s saying in my ear what to repeat, you know, ‘Let’s pray together.’ And I remember praying a prayer then. And I do believe that something changed then. I do believe that something started then.

Jim: As an 11-year-old, Mike took an interest in music when he and his parents visited a church that used drums in their worship service. 

Mike:
00:03:52 I had never seen drums in a church service before. And I remember going, Whoa, they got drums. This is different. So I’m already a little more awake now, you know? And man, they just had beautiful worship that night.

Jim: Afterwards, a guest speaker pointed at Mike, asking him to go down to the front for prayer. Mike was terrified.



Mike:
00:04:11 I had been trying to watch HBO through the scrambles on the TV, and I thought the Lord was about to out me in front of my parents, and that I was surely a dead man. The guy says to me, he says, Man, during this, when we were singing, when we were worshipping the Lord, he goes, I saw musical notes written on your face. The Lord is calling you to write songs. The songs are going to take you far away from your home, even to a foreign land. And he said, Not everybody’s going to like the songs; don’t even give it a second thought, just know that it’s the Lord calling you to do this.

Jim: Going forward, Mike didn’t think too much about what the guest speaker said. He was just thankful he wasn’t embarrassed in front of his parents. 

Mike:
00:04:56 But sure enough, a couple of years later, these little ideas just started showing up at about the same time as an interest in playing guitar. And so I got my first guitar. I always had these little keyboards growing up, you know, you press Go and it’s a little beat or whatever, and I would just chase down these little ideas and write these lyrics that were just kind of there, it felt like. And then that was the beginning.

Jim: Jay, who was 11 at the time, was the athlete of the family. But Mike always tried to convince him to play music, as well.

Mike:
00:05:30 He always made fun of me, the sissy musician or whatever, you know. And then one day I finally was just like, Jay, you got to do this. Like, I think you could do this. And, we got this little scaled-down bass for him.

Jim: Mike helped his little brother pick out a bass guitar to learn to play. Then both the brothers became hooked on music. 

Mike:
00:05:47 We got into all kinds of music. Man, we got into Christian contemporary music, and there was the sound of every kind of music under that banner. And so from—at one point, Christian hip-hop to Christian heavy metal to—so there’s kind of an irony to me that I would be in like Christian adult contemporary—[laugh]—like music after all this time.

Jim: When Mike graduated high school, he had another deep encounter with the Lord that would forever change his life. It happened while he was watching the cartoon movie, Prince of Egypt.

Mike:
00:06:18 I just said, God, I know all this stuff about You, but I want to know You. It just dawned on me at that moment, this guy, Moses, who was about to receive this huge call on his life, heard the voice of God. And I said, I want to know You for real, like one of these guys in the Bible.
Jim: The year after Mike graduated high school, he traveled and played music with a ministry-oriented group.

Mike:
00:06:41 When I came back from that, Jay had been really spending a lot of time, and he was—he’d just grown leaps and bounds and just an incredible, incredible bass player. It was almost like that competitive spirit from the times playing sports, he kind of applied to the bass.

Jim: The brothers started playing together constantly, including at church, where Mike was a part-time worship leader. 

Mike:
00:07:08 Then I wound up going to college at the University of Mobile, which is a great little Baptist school in south Alabama. 

Jim: Although Jay wasn’t a student at University of Mobile, he was there a lot of days. He and his brother became inseparable and together they started a band. They played music and wrote songs with their friends, which is how they ended up filling out the rest of the band. 

Mike:
00:07:29 The first time we ever had played music together, and we’re just messing around. We have no intent here, and somebody wanders by though on campus and goes like, Dude, I dig that saxophone in there. Like, Are you a band? And we’re like, Well, not exactly. And they said, You need to put together a set and come open for this group across campus. Dude, we only been together 15 minutes!

Jim: That’s how the group unintentionally landed their first gig in 1998—but still one more thing was needed. They needed a name to put on the concert flyer.

Mike:
00:07:58 If you’re my size in south Alabama, you are big daddy, right? And so, got members from our church. There was a man who actually just has gone to be with the Lord just in the last week. And he would every Sunday, ‘Hey, big daddy,’ when I’d get up to lead worship and that¬¬—so I told the guy, I said, Hey, tell him that we’re Big Daddy Weave and the Institution is what I said. And I was just kidding, man, and so they put that on. The moral of this entire story is when somebody asks you what you want to call the group, pray and ask the Lord ’cause for the next 25 years, you may be telling the story of what happened.

Jim: As Big Daddy Weave continued to play more shows, prayer became an even larger part of the band.



Mike:
00:08:40 We’d been playing shows, and it looked like worship, you know? But at one point, the Lord began to take a turn in our shows, and we just begin to see just the move of the Holy Spirit. It started one night when I just began to hear things from the Lord and I just began to share those things—not unlike the guy who said that thing over me.

Jim: That’s when God began working through Big Daddy Weave, especially Jay.

Mike:
00:09:02 God just really began to encounter him in the early mornings. So Jay began to lead the charge in praying for people at the shows every night. 

Jim: The brothers witnessed God working in amazing ways. Then, they would face what would seem to be an insurmountable challenge.

Mike:
00:09:19 Our enemy will get in any way he can, and the way he got in is with Jay’s health. And, it was weird because it was diabetes plus; it was not simply diabetes. It was crazy. There were other things that went with it. 

Jim: As the band played more shows and grew increasingly popular, Big Daddy Weave signed a record deal and headed to Nashville where Mike met his future wife. It was around that same time that Jay married his wife, Emily—and all through this, all the while, Jay continued to struggle with his Type 2 diabetes. 

Mike:
00:09:53 Jay went to doctor after doctor, medication after medication, and none of it seemed to fix any of it.

Jim: Jay began to feel like a science experiment as he was left with only pieces of a diagnosis. 

Mike:
00:10:09 It would be that thing of going in and being hugely disappointed, but then, this turn of seeing Jesus begin to move, and so he literally just began to believe; I’m just going to trust the Lord, and I believe the Lord’s just going to heal me.

Jim: Although it wasn’t easy, Jay fought the enemy and continued in his faith. He was praying over people every night, but his health continued to worsen. He had a high pain tolerance, but he couldn’t hide the issues with his health, especially when he got an infection.

Mike:
00:10:37 I saw him sitting in this wheelchair and he just literally just cried from the pain. And I was like, oh my … I said, Jason, we’re calling them [the doctor] right now. 
Jim: When Jay went to the hospital, doctors told him they needed to amputate his foot. Mike decided to cancel an industry event to be with his brother—but Jay said, “Uh-uh.” [negative]

Mike:
00:10:56 He said, “You don’t know who Jesus wants to speak to.” And I remember, I’m like, literally … I’m like crying, like leaving, but I couldn’t do anything there, and so I did what he said.

Jim: At the awards show, Mike received a call from Jay’s wife, Emily. The doctors weren’t just going to have to amputate one foot, but both feet. Jay was about to become a double amputee. 

Mike:
00:11:22 The weight of that information, I remember that settling on our entire group, which really is like a family. But I remember the strength of the idea of being in the body of Jesus. Because literally when that news landed on us, it felt like all of us were there together and we’re holding on to each other and we’re holding on to that news and we’re just holding on to Jesus. 

Jim: During the difficult recovery process, people pulled through for Jay by buying him a bus that would accommodate his electric wheelchair. His wife and three children were able to travel with him to help him with his prosthetics as he began to relearn how to walk. And then, he went on the road again with Big Daddy Weave. 

Mike:
00:12:02 He’s back out there praying for people again. Jay every day would roll through the venue in his chair and he would lay hands on every single seat and he would pray that the Lord move in the life of who’s going to sit in that seat. It was a joy to him. It was not an exercise; it was not a ‘something I just have to power through.’ He would get in there and he delighted in spending time with Jesus, asking for the will of Jesus over the place.

Jim: On one occasion, a former pastor came to one of their events, which included a discussion time. This man appeared hardened. They ended up learning that at one time this man had led a youth event, and one of the youths had died on his watch. After the show, that man somehow ended up in their dressing room, and started shouting expletives. He didn’t understand why they weren’t angry at God, too.

Mike:
00:12:55 All the rest of us literally back up against the wall away from this guy, and Jay does not miss a beat. He finds a space to turn around in his chair, and he comes to the guy and just goes, I get it, man. When I woke up this morning and everything on my body hurt, he said, my first thought in front of the Lord was this: I have seen You heal hundreds of complete strangers in front of me. Did You forget about me? Did I make You mad?
Jim: Jay had this man’s full attention.

Mike:
00:13:24 And he said, Who am I kidding? Jesus didn’t do this to me. Jesus is the only way I’m making it through this day. He’s carrying me through this whole thing.

Jim: That was the answer the man needed to hear. He fell to his knees and wept. 

Mike:
00:13:37 Jay shifts his little electric wheelchair into high gear and just closes that gap. The hand where his fingers are tore up and hurting, he puts on the dude’s head and he just starts praying. He goes, God, just show him he’s not a victim. Show him he’s Your son. Show him when he walked out on You, You never walked out on him. Show him that when he quit believing in You, You didn’t stop believing in him because of that. That You’re with him, that You’re for him right now. 

Jim: Between sobs, the man said, “I wish Jesus would heal you.” While God wouldn’t heal Jay fully on this Earth, God did display His work in Jay in other ways.

Mike:
00:14:15 I saw God take people’s excuses and reason to not believe in Him away when they would watch Jay living with what he had had lived with and lived through … you know, and it’s really incredible. It’s really incredible. That’s a different kind of miracle. Then there’s the other miracle of perseverance, you know, and being the same guy on the day when it’s the worst day of your life because of the Lord’s presence in your life. 

Jim: Jay would persevere all his life, which ended at the beginning of 2022 due to complications from COVID-19. At the time, Mike and his family also had contracted the nasty virus and were unable to see Jay in his final days. 

Mike:
00:15:01 The next thing I hear is, early in the morning Jay fell and literally he just couldn’t get up. Everybody’s dealing with the lung stuff from COVID and his whole family’s wiped out with it too. So they literally had to call for an ambulance. They came and they took him to the hospital. We never heard from him again.

Jim: Jay went into the hospital over New Year’s [2021 to 2022], when Mike’s family was originally supposed to visit him for the holidays. Jay had requested not to be put on a ventilator. That decision devastated the family, who kept checking in on him. 

Mike:
00:15:33 We’re hanging on for like several days, you know, and then we get this word like, well, if he’s not—if you want to honor that request, then you need to come say goodbye to him like right now.

Jim: Because Mike and his family were still in quarantine, Jay’s wife, Emily, called Mike on the phone so he could have one last conversation with his little brother. 

Mike:
00:15:51 I’m just listening … then kind of emotion takes over in the room, man, and people are crying and I just start shouting on the phone. I’m like, Jay … Jason, you are, I said, not by yourself. If you see Jesus anywhere, go with Him. He’s got us. And that was the moment I heard him take his last breath, his exhale, over the phone. 

Jim: And just like that, Jay was finally healed. 

Mike:
00:16:16 In that moment there, that was the end of all of his hurt. I don’t know what it looked like when he saw Him, but I know that Jesus was there.

Jim: The memory of Jay continues to live on through his family and Big Daddy Weave.

Mike:
00:16:28 He was an awesome husband, awesome dad. He was an awesome leader to Big Daddy Weave. Other than like making a set list or talking on the microphone, there wasn’t a lot that didn’t come across his plate, you know, on his desk, you know, at some point. He loved all of it. He loved all the gear. He loved every piece of sound equipment. He loved every little sparkly, twinkly, little weird light. He loved—he loved all of it. And he loved our crew—he loved the guys in the band—but he loved, he loved our crew so much. 

Jim: And even more importantly, Jay is remembered for loving Jesus. 

Mike:
00:17:01 Jay was an amazing man, I’m telling you. He was so funny. [chuckle] He was kind of fearless, whether that meant there was embarrassment in the future or whatever. There’s such a joy that he had. He was 3½ years younger than I was, but he always functioned like the big brother. I looked up to him in so many ways. He just had that, the charisma, that likability, that thing that would draw you to him. And it was funny, and that was fun, but there was a point when all of that changed and there became a depth that I saw in him. The way he described it is Jesus started waking him up at about 3 in the morning, and he would sit with the Lord, and it changed him. He would spend time in God’s Word and it changed him.

Jim: Jay changed others’ lives because Jesus had changed his life. In those days after Jay’s death, Mike grieved the loss of his brother, but clung to Jesus. 

Mike:
00:17:59 He promises that He comforts those who mourn. So I don’t have to hold that back. I don’t have to pretend like it doesn’t hurt with Him. And I can bring it to Him, and when I really do bring it to Him, He brings a kind of comfort that is worth waiting on. 
Jim: Jesus has helped Mike through other seasons of grief, including when he lost his dad to pulmonary fibrosis in 2017 and his mom to cancer less than a year before Jay’s passing.

Mike:
00:18:24 The thing about going through difficult times is that the enemy wants to point to whatever place that is in your story and tell you that’s the end of your story. That’s a lie. Jesus knows when the end of your story is—and by the way, for the believer, there’s no end of the story, that when we pass from this life, that’s the beginning of the story. [chuckle]

MUSIC TRANSITION

Jim: As Mike Weaver just said, your story doesn’t end when you die. If you’re listening, you can know for sure that you’re going to Heaven when you die by entering a relationship with Jesus Christ. If you’re ready to give your life to God, go to FindPeaceWithGod.net. Or, if you’d rather talk with someone about beginning your relationship with Jesus Christ, there is someone waiting for you on our 24/7 prayer line: 855-255-7729. That’s 855-255-PRAY.

MUSIC STARTS

Voice-over: You’re listening to GPS: God. People. Stories., a podcast production of the Billy Graham Evangelistic Association.

Billy Graham:
00:20:00 “If a man die, shall he live again?” Men have asked that question for centuries. They have speculated; they have analyzed; they have grasped at every shred of evidence that points to the possibilities of a future life. “If a man die, shall he live again?”

Voice-over: Billy Graham …

Billy Graham:
00:20:20 The Bible is filled with life after death. Jesus said, “I am the resurrection and the life. He that believeth in Me, though he were dead, yet shall he live.” The Bible says something about the future of the person that is in Christ, the person that has come by faith to receive the Savior, and God’s Word teaches there is a Heaven. It will be a place of righteousness; it will be a place of joy. I have the greatest peace and joy and happiness in my heart because tonight I know where I’m going. How do you get to Heaven? You can’t get there except through Christ. You must come and give yourself to Christ. 

Jim: Like Billy Graham, you can know for sure if you’re going to Heaven. If you do not know for sure, visit our website: FindPeaceWithGod.net. When you’re there, click on “Begin a Relationship With Jesus.” The address again: FindPeaceWithGod.net and look for “Begin a Relationship With Jesus.” 
Our guest on this episode of GPS: God. People. Stories. is Mike Weaver, founding member of the Christian band, Big Daddy Weave. To this day, Mike tells others about Jesus through his music with Big Daddy Weave, and the band continues to pray over every seat ahead of every show—all in memory of Jay.

Mike:
00:21:42 I just want to tell people whenever we’re somewhere, How do you know you’re going to go? There’s only one way to get there. It’s Jesus, you know, receive Him today. “Today is the day of salvation,” the Bible says, right? We’re putting all our trust in Him, all our eggs in His basket, you know what I mean? Knowing that when we step through to the other side, that’s the face that we want to see.

Jim: Absolutely. We’re thankful Mike Weaver is continuing to honor his brother’s memory by sharing the Gospel through music … and sharing his story with us. We’ll be back with another person, with another story in just two weeks¬—and every two weeks thereafter. So, make sure you’re subscribed to GPS so you won’t miss a one. 

I’m Jim Kirkland, and this is GPS: God. People. Stories., it’s an outreach of the Billy Graham Evangelistic Association—Always Good News.

CLOSING MUSIC

# # #